12.21.2012

The crazies believe that the world ends around four years from now, December 21, 2012 to be exact. People (normal people) often meet this revelation with disgust and dismiss it as a joke. I did too. But a part of my consciousness, days after, keeps going back to this thought, especially when I'm alone on a long ride. I keep dwelling on the possibility that the world will end in a few years, and in all honesty, the thought of this possibility actually happening... excites me.

A huge part of me wishes for the world to end by then.

My first reason for being happy about this apocalypse thing is that I can no longer fear death. I only fear the thought of my death because of the people I will leave behind. I cannot go on to an eternity of being curious, of asking the question "What happened after I died?"

If all of us died together, there's no one to leave behind, and death turns into a glorious passing, no longer a medium for sorrow.

Then, all our questions will be answered, in death. Religion, creation, heaven and hell. And as these questions are answered, we find we no longer need an answer. What for?

And then, while we're still here, I can find so many positive things when confronted with the prospect of the end. When our lives are to grind to a halt we realize the most important things and dwell on them. Family, friends, loved ones. We go back to the basics. And we live each day with them knowing this is the last Christmas, the last birthday... We treat them better, we tend to be better people.

I think that when the end is near I will do many things I haven't had the chance or energy to do before. Like satisfy my curiosity for the Bible. I will read it and see what everyone is fussing about, in hopes I will understand too. I know I will.

I will also make amends with my enemies, except the ones I no longer talk to. Oh wait, I never talk to my enemies. What enemies? I don't have enemies, I only have friends and people who no longer exist.

There are also many things I won't do, if the world will definitely be ending. They say charity brings you closer to God, it is with the poor whose God's love is. Well I won't give to charity, it will look like a huge plastic pretentious move in the eyes of God. If I really want to go to heaven, there are other means aside from a sudden impulse to give to charity. Besides, will money really be meaningful in a time like this? Money, along with all the other things that man made, will burn to the ground, will wash out, evaporate, implode. It's the things that you cannot touch, you cannot see, you cannot measure, that I will give to others.

And on a wider scale, nations will eventually set wars aside. The end will bring all the people together. Why fight to the death when death is already coming anyway?

I think when faced with the end of the world, the world will look into itself and wonder, Why now? An answer will come echoing back, Why not? The world is old, we have committed every sin conceivable, and technology can only take us so far. We have already done everything we can do. Music keeps repeating. Movies are being re-made. We go back to past trends. Science has already proven all things but God. This is the perfect end.

If only we can be certain that the world will really end. If only we can prove that this is not a joke, then our lives will change. Until then, all of this is a hoax.

When faced with death we will start seeing the world not quite like how we see it now. Now we look at the horizon but we think about our jobs, our salaries, the coffee we ordered, the murders we committed, the adulteries we are committing, and the coffee arrives and we are preoccupied.

I think, when we know that four years from now, all that we were and all that we are, and all that we will ever be will finally be obliterated, reduced to the dust we once were, then we can look at the horizon and see nothing else, but the horizon.

fuck you emong

Well sa wakas at nagkasignal na sa Bolinao at nakatext ko na ang ilang mga reliable sources like my cousin na nagbalitang kailangan ko nang magpaalam sa bubong ng dati naming bahay dahil kinuha na sya ni Bagyong Emo at sinama sa outer space. Buti na lang at wala nang nakatira sa bahay na yun dahil namundok ang aking Ina at sa Ama naman ay nangibang-bahay (courtesy op da kabit). So hindi ako masyadong malungkot kasi at least safe si Ama sa piling ng kalaguyo, thanks po!

Buti pa ang pinsan ko maraming useful information unlike Khikhi na once a day na nga lang magtext magmumura pa (feeling ko nagalit talaga sa kanya si Mother Nature kaya bumagyo). Useful information like:

1) Oo, nasira ang high school namin, pero look at the bright side, nasira lahat ng schools! August pa raw ang start ng classes.

2) Walang kurtyente dahil naka missionary position lahat ng mga poste sa Bani. Baduy!

3) Marami ang walang matirhan sa 30 na baranggay. I think pwedeng makatulong dito ang $25K United Nations fund nila Pinky.

I hope na sa blog na ito ay matawag ang pansin ni Madam President at magbigay ng mga trailer homes man lang sa mga walang matuluyan. Pero malamang hindi nya ito mabasa, (kasi tayo tayo lang ang naglolokohan dito) unless maisip nyang magsearch sa Google ng "babasahing bastos" o kaya "effective ba ang cytotec sa bagong raspa", so baka may chance na maligaw sya dito. Wishful thinking din na mabasa ito ni President Obama, unless mag-Google sya ng "fininger si Ate"... Hopeless case.

Feeling ko sikat ang Bolinao ngayon kasi alam ng lahat na sinalakay kami ng Bagyong Emo so madali sya i-Google. Summer pa man din, baka may makaisip pa magswimming. Go Tourism.

Nga pala, Thanks for all your prayers guys I think my family there is safe, kasi nung nakatawag ako kay Ama ang sabi nya ay...

"Lowbatt ako pwede ba bukas ka na tumawag, nagma-mah jong kami."

Salamat Lord! Mwah.

inside the tragedy

Let the pictures speak...



Sundowner's Bar, where friends used to drink.




Our school, where friends used to drink.




Our beloved librarian's house.





Part of our Church.




Part of our Church.





The typhoon...



Bolinao... the storm is over... the darkest hours have passed...

Photos courtesy of Ramong and Bing Cuba. Thank you po, kahit hindi ako nagpaalam...

bolinao, a tragedy

Hey Kids, malungkot me today.

Siguro naman naaalala nyo kung paano ko balahurain ang aking hometown... actually hindi ang town kundi ang mga balasubas na taong taga-dun like Dyan Khikhi Khar Bri Jing etc.

Pero hindi ngayon ang araw para magbabuyan. Recently malamang napansin nyong madilim ang langit at maulan. Kasi, may bagyo, ang bright mo talaga. Bagyong Emong.

Kagabi habang naglalakad ako pauwi, nakatanggap ako ng overseas call mula sa aking bestfriend na humihingi ng tulong... Hindi nya macontact ang pamilya nya at kahit sino na nasa Bolinao, at nabalitaaan nyang nasalanta ang maraming kabahayan, kasama na ang bahay nila... Sinubukan kong tawagan lahat ng mga kakilala ko na nasa Bolinao, except yung mga kaaway ko of course. Kahit mga kamag-anakan kong lagi kong iniiwasang itext ay tinawagan ko na. Lahat sila ay "Duh subscriber cannot be rich."

Hay Bagyong Emong. You're so emo. Ikaw na yata ang pinaka-emo na bagyo sa lahat ng bagyo. Anong ginawa mo sa Bolinao?

According to Binibining KihKih, "Leche ubos ang Bolinao."

Kahit alam nating lahat na exaggerated si BB Gandang-Kiki, mukhang 99% accurate ang tsismis nya ngayon...

Natanggal ang tatlong capiz na bintana ng kanilang bahay. Nakalbo ang simbahan. Basa ang mga tao habang naglalakad at nageevacuate. Walang signal both cellphone at landline. Paload, please, victima ako ng calamity...

Sa gitna ng kalamidad at pagdurusa kitang-kita pa rin ang pagka-oportunista ni Khikhi pero I don't mind, mabait ako in times of tragedy. Pero di ko pa rin sya niloadan.

Sabi sa news at sa Internets ay signal number 3 ngayon sa maraming barriotic na areas sa Pangasinan. Na-mention din na tinamaan ng matindi ang Bolinao as in Kicked in the Bolz. Pero hindi nabanggit ang kalunos-lunos na kalagayan ng mga taong nagsisilikas. Hanggang Dagupan lang ang inabot ng news team, at nung ipakita ang mga evacuees sa Dagupan ay hindi naman sila kalunos-lunos tignan habang kumakaway sila sa camera sa likod ng reporter.

Dagdag pa ng aking bestfriend na by some miracle ay nakatawag sa Papa nya...

Lahat sinira ng bagyo...
Humingi ng tulong si Mayor kay Gloria...
Tumba lahat ng poste ng kuryente...
90% daw ng Bolinao ang nasira ng bagyo...

To think na katatapos lang ng piyesta... Hayyy Bolinao, I'm sure makakabangon ka rin at muling magyayabang, ngunit ngayon ay kailangan munang maging payapa sa dilim at magback-to-basics. Ano kaya ang ginawa natin at bakit tayo pinarusahan ng ganito? Siguro habang nasa dilim at sa lamig, makakapagreflect tayo...

So Kids kahit alam kong masasama ang mga ugali nyo, I want to ask for your support and konting donasyon... para sa aking nalalapit na pagpapa-lipo...

And prayers for Bolinao... It's my hometown, at mahal ko ito. Di nga, promise. Nothing will take the place of my hometown. Kahit marami akong kagalit dun. Sana yung mga kagalit ko na lang ang nasalanta, nabasa, nawalan ng bahay at kinarma nang very very nice.

And prayers sa mga taong nawalan ng kuryente, signal ng phone, ng Internet. Prayers para sa mga taong nawalan ng business, nadurong ang sasakyan, nawalan ng bintana. Higit sa lahat, prayers sa mga taong nawalan ng tahanan, hindi alam kung saan matutulog ngayong gabi...

And God knows kung anong nangyari sa mga kamag-anak kong hanggang ngayon hindi ko pa nacocontact...

Habang wala pa kaming balita ay malaking tulong ang screenshots ni Dyan ng Google Earth (click mo):




Bolinao... kapag may news team na, kumaway kayo...

Shows that we ain't gonna stand shit,
Shows that we are united,
Shows that we ain't gonna take it...
--Adele, "Hometown Glory"
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